MELLOW-ed

as i was showering a moment ago, it came to my head that i have forgiven my friend for whatever my friend did the other day. remember my previous post?

i should have realized ages ago , that some people are just like that. they are nasty or silly or snobbish or air headed or funny coz they are just like that. if i were to blame them of whatever their behaviour that has been bugging me, i should have blamed their upbringings.

just as the moment i thought of blaming their upbringings, i guess everyone might as well be blaming my upbringing for whatever attitude that i might have in me, that people don't really fancy, no?

so, as i try to understand that i am just like this coz i am like this; stubborn , clumsy , absent minded and all, and maybe snobbish, i guess i got to accept that others are like that coz that's just the way they are then. maybe you could blame my upbringing for whatever i have become, but blame me and my decisions and choices too for i've decided on what i want to be.

but maybe to some, some attitudes are genuinely unnoticeable (i.e memang tak perasan bahawa dia seorang yang kerek) hence they wouldn't realize that what they did wasn't right/cool/appreciated/great at all. some people are insensitive like that. some wouldn't want to learn from surroundings or friends. well, that's a matter of choice i suppose and of course upbringing.

and as much as i don't fancy insensitive people, i should have realized by now that i could, some way or another be an insensitive bitch to those that doesn't matter much to me. no?

this is all a circle. a love-hate triangle. owh and since this is a pattern that has to be or will be repeated , i guess it's all fractals.

well, am supposed to be reading notes right about now, but i am bored and lazy like that. owh and this u could blame myself for i choose to be bored and lazy. heh.

wish me luck!